( #002 ) FAKE MARRIED AU

[chatona]

the 'fake married' meme

be it for a job, in order to get your inheritance or to fool your nosy neighbours, you are pretending to be married. now the question is, do you want it to be real or can you hardly wait for it to be over?

Comments

[slums]

[ Let's elope, brave hero!

Or something like that. Good ol' Aerith, last of her race, once dead and now in outer space Marvel land, is absolutely great with parties. She knows how to flirt, she knows enough dance moves, and she's excellent at keeping people entertained-- for the most part. She's also quite adept at selling her role-- which in this case, happens to be the blushing bride of one Peter Quill. Why? There's probably something worth stealing at this party, let's go with that, and she's helping him out. After all, she could use some protection for the evening. Even after cheating death, it just seems that she cannot escape all sorts of pursuers wanting to use her for her planet-speaking magics. Tough luck!

All of that aside, she's positively beaming, holding his arm, making up some story about the first date they went on (she slips in teasing comments about it, too) to a pair of grizzly looking aliens who probably find it quite cute, if they knew anything about Terran courting rituals. She's remembered to slip on a ring just for the occasion, but probably shouldn't have bothered if she knew everyone here would be so... different.

Peter might have more experience with this than her, oops. ]

So anyway, as I was saying-- we're here for the honeymoon. Isn't that right?

[nostalgiabomb]

Yep. If I remember right, you had suggested this would be a good way to strengthen our relationship. And it’s seriously hard to say no when you do that puppy-dog pout.

[ The aliens in question make a sort of chittering sound, which Peter knows is their way of laughing; after that, they go into their own story of their first meeting, and—okay, Peter totally zones out. He hates listening to this stuff, but he keeps smiling his pleasant smile, feigning interest.

Playing the role of newlywed and husband had always been pretty low on Peter’s list. He much preferred cool stuff, like playboy or super spy, but he’s also had to make-do with idiot and drunkard and totally and completely lost. (He worries that he’ll be typecast one of these days, so he’s making an effort to branch out.)

Suffice it to say, he’s really damned surprised at how well Aerith has taken to this whole lying business. When the job came up and it became clear that the only appropriate cover would be “married couple” (given, of course that the gathering was a couple’s retreat), Aerith had been the only suitable choice (seeing as how Gamora, trained warrior and assassin, did not have the words “sociable” and “bubbly” in her vocabulary). He had assumed he would be doing all the talking, but when the first couple had intercepted them to chat, she had totally stepped up and shocked the hell out of him.

The couple they’re speaking to chitter again, and Peter doesn’t hesitate to laugh quietly along with them. He totally didn’t hear the joke, but the expectant look on the woman’s face clues him in to the appropriate response pretty quickly. After that, he silently breathes a sigh of relief when they wave to another couple, say their goodbyes, and move to join them.

He leans in close to whisper in Aerith’s ear, looking every bit the part of a loving, romantic husband -- complete with a small, private smile and a half-lidded gaze that screamed “I only have eyes for you.” It would totally ruin the effect if anyone but Aerith could hear what he actually says, though. ]

Holy shit, they were boring as hell. Did you see the way the wife kept fidgeting? She’s totally doing their pool boy.